Sides of Me

One of Johnny Cash’s most famous sayings was that there was two men inside of him. One was John the other Cash. Cash caused all the trouble and the two fought. I have come to believe we all have at least two people inside of us. Maybe three… four tops. Once you get to five your most likely, certifiably crazy. The sides of us – these other people – balance us. Drive us. They are the constant argument inside of our bodies. These personalities makes us who we are.

One keeps the other in check. Like the balance on the scales of justice. When I look back on my past I see two people. I see Kendra, the whole person who works and goes to school and hangs out with friends. But I see Gabby (a CB handle I was given as a small child and hold dear.) *Editor’s note.* Gabby the girl who was raised in camouflage on a polled Hereford farm in Fieldon, lived only for coyote hunting and being better than the boys. I also accuse her for any lapses in sanity and judgment.

Kendra and Gabby argue a lot. Gabby wants to get back to her roots and Kendra has a strong mental illusion that she hasn’t lost it. They fight over her mental stability among other things.

It’s the inner nice girl and the inner witch. In most cases that balance each other out. Yin and Yang. Equal halves of a whole. Southern Comfort and Mountain Dew. Okay… maybe not a great example. But you get the point.

They say that a light amount of stress at temporary length of time is good for you. It drives you and pushes you to meet goals and to get where you need to be. You know that final peak of Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs called self-actualization? Okay so you failed Health but at least I learned something in Medical Assisting classes today.

A good amount of inner battle is good as well. Driving someone to do better. Pushing them beyond their limits and testing new waters. Even if it’s all on an inner dare.

If Johnny and Cash hadn’t fought the life of country music would be much different and probably a bore. Johnny never would have done music in places like Folsom Prison and we wouldn’t have songs like Cocaine Blues. Cash may never have gotten June if Cash hadn’t been such an ass about it because Johnny never would have ruined his first marriage. And we would be without one of the greatest love stories country music has ever known. No spouse can make us ‘Walk the Line’, but, instead it’s the inner battle that pulls us in both direction and helps us choose that inner balance that inner line to walk. When we find that it’s what takes us to our own actualization.  

 

 

*If you don’t know what a CB handle is you have two choices, stop reading now and never return or watch Smokey and the Bandit for some lessons on life.*